That I would establish myself as a ‘very successful career woman ‘was never on my priorities which was quite unusual given the fact that I worked really hard all those years of my student life to score a ‘perfect ten’ and I became majorly successful in writing an enviable resume with all the gems that I earned with my hard work and diligence. Being a full time house wife was also not in my agenda, though and I decided on my priorities very clearly long before entering into matrimonial ‘bliss’. As per my list of priorities, post marriage, I wanted to be a mother most of the time and thought of ‘doing something’ to keep myself ‘meaningfully engaged’ so that balancing ‘work and home’ does not take a toll on my children’s well being!
Although there was nothing against boys, I always wanted a girl to call me’ Ma’ first and when I was expecting my first child, my imagination was full with all those lovely frocks and dresses, barbies and kitchen sets, hair bands and clips. May be, because I wanted the girl so earnestly, I was granted the wish and a ‘pretty as picture’ princess was born to me in January 2002. I plunged into full time motherhood straight on taking a break from my ‘meaningful engagement’. There was not a single moment when I had to regret my decision of taking a break as my princess was quite a handful.
As soon as her body clock was set to routine, she ate and drank whatever I had given her and slept whenever she felt like. I never quite believed the mothers who said that they had to be up and awake the entire night to feed the baby or putting him/her to sleep! Ever since she started speaking, we mother-daughter ran into endless conversations the entire day and slept like hogs during the night. She learnt to keep herself busy with her toys, dolls, kitchen sets, crayons, drawing books and things like that from an early age giving me enough opportunity to catch up with my things. I didn’t even realise when she turned two and started her pre-school.
She is as sweet as her name goes ‘Misti’.
Around that time, we decided to bring a companion for Misti and this time, it was a boy to complete the family. Misti was over the moon when she first saw her brother in the hospital even though she was barely two years old at that time!
Ah, our peaceful world went into a frantic frenzy from day one when Chhutku was born. He invaded into Misti’s world like mercenary with all his wailing, whining, erratic sleeping schedules, and distinct taste for spicy food! I was going crazy by the day with all his tantrums and nights were nightmarish as he would not allow me to rest for 15 minutes at a stretch during nights till he was about 3 – 3 ½. Misti did all the adjustments whenever needed without even being asked to do that but she would never complain! As if that was not enough for a responsible big sister, she would put an all-out effort to play with her brother so that Mimia (she used to call me mimia when she was small) could catch a few winks after lunch. She is my adorable ‘big princess’ now.
On every parent – teacher meeting in Misti’s school, the teachers unanimously agreed that she was a child far mature than her age, caring and accommodating to everyone in the class and outside and she was a ‘teacher’s pet’ in true sense of the term. Certificates and medals, academic and extracurricular, filled a whole drawer and she added to my pride each passing day! When she shifted to Wellington in Dubai, the first parent-teacher meeting that I attended, the teacher started,” Poushali (her good name) is a rare gem, Mrs. Ray” and my pride knew no bound ! She achieved the “best learner medal” this year and sometimes, I do not hesitate to seek her opinion when I cannot decide on something serious……. She is only 10 and already a ‘friend, philosopher and guide’ to me. Can any mother ask for more than this?
And here comes my little devil – Chhutku. He settled down gradually and started his pre-school but was more interested in the variety in his lunch box rather than learning his alphabets. He finds out weird tricks to drive all of us insane even now. When he started going to regular school (same school as his sister’s), all teachers commented, “Divit is very intelligent but very restless as well. Mrs. Ray, he loves to talk with so much expression and we love that!” and surprisingly enough, he was the favorite amongst teachers and classmates for his innocence, simplicity, lack of maturity and honesty. He became a member of the ‘dramatics club’ for his ability to ‘talk with expression ‘and the ‘drummer’ of the junior choir of his school and without him, there would not be any cultural activity in school. He also earned quite a few numbers of certificates from school for various achievements and I am certainly proud of whatever he is. He has started Yr 3 at Wellington with a bang this year with a determination to earn the ‘best learner medal’! All the best my little pumpkin – you can do that!
Now that he is going to be eight very soon, his sleeping habits have changed drastically on the opposite direction – he would not wake up for school unless he is splashed with cold water, almost! He will fight tooth and nail with his sister for a piece of crayon, sometimes, but will seek protection from his sister when he needs to settle score with his enemies. Had his sister not been so blessed with sanity and maturity, there would have been blood-shed everyday in the school, or bus, or park or playground probably!! Misti can win any battle out with her word power, clipped accent and measured expression but at the hour of need, Chhutku will only let his tear duct open and after few moments of helplessness, will let his limbs loose!
As a mother, I know he is gem of a boy but with only one short-coming that he cannot hide his emotions – his sadness ( he will cry his heart out in front of whole class if hurt), his joy ( will give you few hugs and kisses when happy even if you don’t like it), his anger ( will punch you straight on your face if you irritate him for no reason), his frustration (will use those bad words ,the big brothers at school use , to my horror ) and he knows no pretence! I am worried that there are very few people in this world who would value his innocence, honesty and simplicity and does emotion have any place in this era of machines (human or otherwise)? He would be a total mis-fit in this big, bad world if he does not learn to hide his emotions and be mentally strong.
He is equally adorable with all his naughtiness, wittiness and frequent “you are the best Mum” anecdotes and is quite popular outside home for being responsible, sharing and caring, much to my amusement. May be, with time, he would adapt to the requirements of ‘survival of the fittest’.
…….but he must know that his Mum will always be there for him, if he needs a shoulder to cry on or he needs someone to listen to him when no one has time for him or for all those hugs and kisses which might embarrass others…..
A rare gem that he is…….
On a lighter note, dealing with his emotional outbreak is still easier for me but when he asks me,” mum what kind of engine does a Lamborghini have?” or “ Mum can we connect our PSP to the TV?”, or “ Mum, what is an i-pad or i-pod or i-phone?” – I draw a blank face. After several of such occasions, he now does not wait for me to fumble for answer rather he initiates search in Google and explain things to me with so much sincerity and authority! Machines of any kind fascinate him so much that all his electronic toys are dis-functional because he wanted to explore the mechanism but could not re-fix after that!!
But I trust him completely in matters related to machines and techniques, be it putting cells in TV remote or fixing the screw of my pressure cooker handle. After all to make a name in the field of engineering, he must be given enough opportunity for on-the-job training……..
While Chhutku would happily settle for ‘biriyani’ or ‘chicken tikka’ or ‘palak paneer’ from any restaurant in the city, Misti would prefer to have ‘lunch at Hilton or Movenpick’ occasionally ,even though , she would not express her wish vocally. She is elegant, subtle and sensible where as the little one is simple, vocal and sensitive! Is not God great for balancing the flavors when He decided to make me mother of two – a boy and a girl?
….and so even if they are way apart in their attitude and attributes, and there are moments of crisis dealing with the ‘sensitive’ one and the ‘sensible’ one, my days and some parts of nights ,are full with laughter, tear, fist fights, and loads of hugs and kisses .
Sometimes, I wonder how children of same set of parents can be so different in attributes but whatever be the fact, in my world, there is no sunshine without my Princess and the Devil!!
No comments:
Post a Comment